


smile for me

by hunzi



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Arguments, Breakups, Conflict, Fighting, M/M, Rain, Storm - Freeform, close to death scenarios, life threatening, really fucking messy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 14:44:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11557371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunzi/pseuds/hunzi
Summary: "You're so far away, Jun." Minghao looked away. "I don't know how to reach you anymore."or, where jun realises that he doesn't know how to make minghao smile anymore





	smile for me

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! im back from the dead
> 
> so i wrote this fic bc i was feeling hella Upset, so instead of working out my emotions, i decided to force the, onto my characters!!! how nice!!
> 
> because of that, this is kinda of a mess, so if you spot any errors please let me know! i'll be more than happy to fix them (:
> 
> that being said, please enjoy this fic! i love u all very much ❤️
> 
> twitter: smiiefiowers

"Minghao?" Jun kicked the door shut behind him, absentmindedly throwing his keys on the small table by it. The fell down to the wood with a muffled clatter. "I'm home."

Silence echoed back. The older boy frowned, peering around the dimly lit apartment. It wasn't like Minghao to not be home so late. "Minghao? You home?" He tried again.

"Out here," Jun turned to see the younger boy in the balcony, wind furiously whipping his already short hair around. The moonlight shed quiet light on him, illuminating his cheek and collar bones.

"Hey," Jun frowned, stepping into the balcony. Minghao turned, gave the other boy a quick glance, before facing back out to the skyline again. "You okay?"

Minghao closed his eyes and hummed in agreement, though Jun wasn't buying it. "Yeah, just..." He trailed off, opening his eyes. Once again, he took in Jun's figure, like he couldn't fully comprehend that he was there, standing in front of him. "Tired. I'm just tired."

Jun nodded in understanding, turning so that he, too, was now facing the skyline with his forearms on the cool metal railing of the balcony. "I see." He mumbled, taking in a breath of fresh air. "What'd you do today?"

"Nothing much." Minghao stepped away from the railing and crossed his arms, letting out a quiet sigh. "Why?"

"I was just wondering, that's all." Jun did the same, but left his hands in his pockets. "Wanted to know why you were tired."

Minghao looked away, eyes dull. "I just am." His voice was low, and dangerous. Jun's scowl deepened. "I didn't think I'd have to explain that."

"Hey," Jun raised an eyebrow, confused. "No need to get so defensive. Just wanted to make sure you're alright." He turned back to the skyline. "I do care about you, you know."

The younger boy scoffed, and Jun watched as his arms clenched. "Is that so," He replied, drily.

"Okay, look." Jun finally huffed. He turned completely, so he was looking Minghao in the eye. Or as well as he could, anyway. Minghao wouldn't meet his eye. "I've tried to be gentle and nice about this, but you're not helping. Did I do something?"

Minghao looked down at his feet. "Not exactly." He muttered. In a flash, he glanced up at Jun, but before the other boy could react, his eyes were on the floor again. "Do you— um, do you wanna go inside?"

Jun considered it for a while, then shook his head. "I'm okay here. Unless you wanna go inside?"

"No, I'm okay." Minghao took a deep breath. "Uh, we need to talk."

That caught Jun's attention. He crossed his arms. "Sure, uh, go ahead."

"We've been dating for a while, right?" Jun nodded. "Like, since I first came to Korea? The point is, we've been together long. And it's been good and stuff, but I think—" His voice caught, and he bit his lip. "I think it's run its course."

It took a minute for Jun to process what was going on. "Run its course." He repeated, a lump forming in his throat. Though he knew the answer, he couldn't help but ask: "What do you mean?"

"I think you know what I mean, Jun." Minghao's voice was eerily quiet, and it gave Jun chills. "Do I really have to spell it out for you?"

"Yes," Jun croaked, voice hoarse. "Spell it out. Because I can't think of anything that could have happened that would make you wanna resort to ... _this_."

"You're so far away, Jun." Minghao looked away. "I don't know how to reach you anymore."

"Talk to me. Tell me." Jun knew he sounded desperate, and that there were probably tears on his face, but he couldn't tear his gaze from Minghao. "Do _anything_. I'm listening."

"So what if you are?" Minghao shook his head. "We've run out of time, Jun, and—"

"Bullshit." Jun mumbled.

Minghao raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

" _Bullshit_!" Jun yelled, unable to take it any longer. "Bullshit! You're too scared to do this anymore, so you're just pushing me away! I call _bullshit_!"

"So what if I'm too scared?" Minghao yelled back. The wind was stronger than ever, whipping his words furiously around Jun. "What are you gonna do? _Console_ me? Those days are long gone, Jun!"

"Are they? Or do you _want_ them to be?" Jun took a step closer. Minghao stepped back. "You're not letting me help you, Minghao. You're not letting me come any closer."

"What's the point?" Minghao snapped, crossing his arms. "You're never even home, Jun. Even if I tell you, you dart off to _God knows where_ before we can even sort it out, and then _I'm_ the one left to fix things myself."

"You know _goddamn_ well that's not my fault," Jun hissed, taking a step closer. Minghao scoffed and took another step away. "I'm the only one doing anything to support us! Can you blame me for that?"

"I can, actually." Minghao spat. "I get that you need to work, but I don't get that you're putting it in front of me. That's why I'm doing this, to let you have what you want. Happy?"

"No, I'm not!" Jun shook his head. "You're my _boyfriend_ , for fuck's sake! Start acting like it!."

"Listen to yourself!" Minghao roared. "If you really cared, you wouldn't be telling me how to act, Jun!"

"I do care, Minghao, thats why I'm telling you all of this!" Jun ran a hand through his hair, exasperated. "I'm sick of seeing you this, you know."

"Oh, I'm sorry my loneliness is such an _inconvenience_ to you, Your Highness." Minghao snapped drily.

"Shut up, you know damn well that's not what I mean." The older boy snapped. "What do you want me to do? Leave my job so I can sit and play Oprah for you?”

"I'm not asking for your pity!" Minghao's chest rose up and down rapidly, breathing heavily. "I'm just asking you to get your head out of your briefcase for just one second so you can see that there are others around you who need and miss you!"

"I know that plenty well!" Jun yelled, hands trembling in rage. "I know, and that's why I'm working harder than ever to get more shifts done so that I can have a nice weekend with you, or-or  _something_! I'm not stupid, Minghao!"

"Oh, _please_." Minghao rolled his eyes. " _Bite_ me, Jun. You're so occupied with your work you can't see anyone else around you, can you?"

"You think I'm lying?" Jun could hardly see, his vision blurred with anger. "You actually think that _now_ , of all times, I would pull that sort of shit on you?" He took another step closer, with which Minghao stepped back.

"I do." Minghao replied defiantly. "I really, truly, with all my heart, believe so." His voice was calm and flat. "What are you gonna do?"

"Why you _little_ —" Jun lunged forward, fist clenched around the collar of Minghao's shirt. The force of it shoved the younger boy dangerously close to the edge of the balcony, and as Minghao's eyes widened, thunder broke above them and a furious downpour started to bang on the roofs around them.

All of a sudden, the rage left Jun's eyes, now replaced with fear. Hands trembling, he pulled Minghao closer to him, eyes wide. Tears flowed freely as he clenched the other boy to his chest, shaking in fear of what he'd almost done.

"Minghao," He sobbed, eyes screwing shut. "I'm so sorry, I would never hurt you intentionally, I was just—"

"Jun." Minghao's voice was devoid of any emotion. "Let go of me."

In a flash, the older did what he was told, rain mixing in with his tears. He looked Minghao up and down, and realised the shaking was mostly coming from the younger boy. "I'm sorry, Mingh—"

"Don't say, anything. Don't say a word." Minghao's voice caught, and Jun saw he was crying, too. "Not a word."

They stood there in silence, silently crying, eyes worriedly scanning the other, thinking back to what'd just happened. The rain was relentless, harsher and stronger than ever. Jun could barely make out Minghao's figure in it.

Jun looked at Minghao, silent. He watched as the younger boy's shoulder's shook, watched as he hid his face away so Jun couldn't see the pain and sadness in his eyes. And that's when Jun realised, that was the look he'd most commonly associated with Minghao. That's how he would always remember him.

And it sucked.

All of a sudden, the familiar sound of Jun's ringtone rang out, almost inaudible amongst the thunder. Minghao's neck jerked back, like he'd been slapped, and he gestured toward it. "Aren't you gonna get it?"

Jun followed his gaze. "It's probably work." He looked back at Minghao. "It can wait."

Minghao looked away. "This doesn't change anything, you know."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," Minghao took a deep breath. "I still wanna break up."

"Minghao, _please_." Jun was quiet, desperate. He couldn't risk losing Minghao again, not so soon. "How do I fix this? How do I make you smile?" The tears on his face glistened in the moonlight, like sad stars. "How do I bring you back?"

"I should be asking you," Minghao took a step closer to Jun, but the elder didn't budge. Hands still trembling, Minghao placed a hand on Jun's face. "Stay safe, okay?"

"Minghao, please." Jun closed his eyes, still crying, and placed his hand on top of the other boy's. "It doesn't have to be this way. We can fix this."

Minghao shook his head, and pulled his hand away. "I would say it isn't goodbye," He paused, taking Jun's image in again, like he was trying to soak up as much of him as possible. "But that would be a lie."

"Minghao," Jun started, but Minghao was too far gone. Lightning strived the sky as Minghao stepped into the house, still dripping wet, and shut the door behind him.

And Jun fell to the floor, drowning in his tears and the rain.

**Author's Note:**

> AAAAA i feel terrible!!
> 
> if u have anything at all to say, leave me something in the comments! i'll respond to them all
> 
> thank u for leaving kudos and i hope u have the best day possible, ur ults and i adore u endlessly
> 
> ps: if ur looking for some haikyuu!! fanfiction i still have my anime acc on here up! check me out: pastelhajime
> 
> ❤️


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